Oops! I Almost Did It Again
I Almost Built a Business I'd Immediately Resent — Here's How I Stopped Myself
Hey friend!
Oops! I did it again. (Yes, please channel your inner Britney here.)
As a regular reader of this newsletter, you know that I’ve been almost maniacal about protecting me and my time. I know it must come across a little nuts, but that’s what happens when you’ve gone beyond burnout, way past utter and total exhaustion, and “I don’t give a shit” (not to be confused with “Don’t fuck with me”) becomes your new anthem.
So when I tell you I almost — ALMOST — said yes to building an entirely new business venture, you’re probably wondering: What the hell, Heather?
Let me explain.
The Pattern I Didn’t See Coming
In order to really explain, let me go back to 2023. I was just about out of the day-to-day of RSG Sales. And for some God-forsaken reason, I thought that meant I had to “do something else.”
I started a podcast for women entrepreneurs called “Boundaries, Business, and Boobs.” (I think you can still find it on Apple Podcasts if you’re feeling nostalgic or masochistic.) I was going to use the podcast to get followers and grow some sort of mastermind or coaching program. As you can tell by the way I’m describing it, I really didn’t know what I wanted to do. Anyway, back to the podcast.
I hired a good friend who had a podcast production company to produce the show, but I didn’t really do anything at all to try and grow my audience. In my delusion, I thought listeners would just show up. I don’t know what I was thinking other than I needed to be busy.
Roll into 2024, and life threw me one curveball after another.
I dropped the podcast and went into survival mode. I’ve talked about this year a lot in the newsletter, but if you need a refresher, [click here].
Fast forward to January 2025. I decided to start this Substack. It was a platform I could relate to. It allowed me to create but didn’t feel cheesy or sleazy like Instagram and TikTok did. It was actually the Substack newsletter that gave me the idea to write a book.
I like talking to and helping other business owners, so it seemed like a perfect match. To be honest, it has been.
BUT here is where I got all wonky.
The “Should” That Almost Got Me
I thought that if I had a newsletter community and a book, then I needed to really leverage it and create... you guessed it, a Mastermind or Big Event. I needed to really monetize things.
You know, like you’re “supposed to.”
I was talking to a friend of mine about the mastermind idea. She said she wished there was a mastermind group that was really focused on 7-figure women entrepreneurs. We had each looked for something but couldn’t really find what we were looking for. Of course, the conversation turned into “We should build it together.”
I did say that I thought it was a few years away.
Until two weeks ago.
My friend called to say she had figured out how we could start the mastermind group sooner. First, I was and still am flattered that she wanted to build it with me.
After talking through it a bit, I told her I needed to think about it and talk to Josh.
Here’s the thing: It took me two weeks to mention it to Josh.
Instead of excitement, I was filled with angst. When I finally walked Josh through the whole thing, he did something I was not expecting. He told me I should do it. It was a great opportunity, and there was a market for that type of group. He kept going on and on.
I must have turned a deeper and deeper shade of putrid green because he said, “Are you okay? You look like you want to throw up.”
Instead, I burst into tears. (Kind of the same thing, really.)
The Body Knows
I realized that I didn’t want to tell Josh because that made it real. I knew deep down that starting a mastermind group was not at all what I wanted to do any longer. I felt it at a visceral level.
This is when Britney was singing loud and clear in my head, except this time it was “Oops, I ALMOST did it again.”
Y’all, this is what growth looks like. Not the absence of temptation or old patterns showing up. Not never being presented with “good opportunities” that aren’t right for you.
Growth is catching yourself BEFORE you say yes to the thing that looks good on paper but makes you want to vomit in real life.
I have finally reached the point where I am listening to my head and my body.
What I’m Learning About This Season
I have aged out of hustle culture. I am embracing ease, sustainability, and meaning. There isn’t a damn thing wrong with wanting more and wanting to scale. It’s just not right for me any longer.
The old version of me would have:
Said yes immediately because it was a “great opportunity”
Convinced myself I could make it work
Pushed through the physical resistance
Built the thing, resented the thing, then had to unwind the thing
The current version of me:
Waited two weeks to even mention it (my body already knew)
Cried when confronted with having to make it real (my emotions knew)
Finally listened to both and said no (my brain caught up)
This isn’t about ambition. This isn’t about being lazy or scared. This is about finally understanding that the right opportunities energize you, and the wrong ones drain you before you even begin.
What I’m Actually Building
I’m focusing on finishing up the book, writing this newsletter, and recording the podcast. Along the way, I hope to slowly start a new kind of community.
One that is filled with ease and joy and meaning.
Not one built on a launch calendar, revenue projections, and “how do we scale this?” (Though if you want to build that, more power to you — I’m just not your girl anymore.)
But one that grows organically around the work I’m already doing. One where the structure supports the life I want, not the other way around.
The Question You Might Need to Ask
So here’s what I want to ask you, friend:
What opportunity are you sitting on right now that looks perfect on paper but makes you feel green when you think about actually doing it?
What “should” keeps circling back that you keep trying to talk yourself into wanting?
What are you avoiding telling your partner, your business partner, your team — because saying it out loud makes it too real, and you already know in your gut that it’s wrong?
Your body knows. Your tears know. Your two-week avoidance knows.
The question is: Are you listening?
Permission Slip
You have permission to:
Turn down good opportunities that aren’t right for YOU
Disappoint people who had big ideas for your next chapter
Choose ease over expansion
Build slower, smaller, and more sustainably
Age out of hustle culture
Want something different than what you wanted five years ago
Let your body have veto power over your ambition
I’m not saying never take risks. I’m not saying never say yes to hard things.
I’m saying: Stop saying yes to things that make you want to throw up just because they check someone else’s boxes for what success should look like.
I wanted to thank y’all for coming on this journey with me. For reading along while I figure out what this next season looks like. For giving me the space to change my mind, to grow, to choose differently.
This newsletter? It’s my version of ease. Of meaning. Of building something that feels good, not just looks good.
And if you’re here? I’m guessing you’re looking for the same thing.
xx, Heather
P.S. If you know someone who might be feeling the same way — standing at the edge of another “should,” trying to talk themselves into it — would you mind forwarding them this newsletter? Sometimes we all need permission to listen to our bodies and choose differently. I’d really appreciate it.